This semester/internship has shown/reminded me of a few things...
- I do not want to teach Elementary school...EVER.
- God is faithful.
- I'M GETTING OLD(er) Almost 23?! HUH?! WHAT?! 23?!
- Coaching was the best decision - even though many thought it would be "too much".
- I am still the same procrastinator that I've always been, I've just gotten better at it.
- I have never felt more comfortable/in my element, than when I'm on the Volleyball court, and/or in the classroom.
- I am surrounded by a fabulous support group, who pray for me, encourage me, and love on me without any conditions or expectations.
- Family isn't always biological - I've been blessed with more than I know what to do with! (Kammer, Alfie, Mama, Pops, GiGi, Coach, Lala, Yeyo, Tia, Heather, Scoot, I could go on and on...)
- Success isn't about a career or a dollar, but about the lives you invest in.
As school wraps up, the planning starts again. The type of planning where I'm laying out the next ten years of my life. Weird thing is... after Graduation, I now simply say - "Next ten years? They're going to be awesome. Doing whatever God calls me to." See, that's the plan. When I moved back home, God literally wiped my 10 year plan completely away. Past graduation I had NO CLUE what the heck I would be doing, where I would be doing it, and who I would be doing it with. NO FLIPPING IDEA. For a while that scared the junk out of me, but over the last 3 and half years I've realized that knowing the plan isn't the point. It's trusting the planner that's important.
As much as I sometimes feel that "I'm doing it wrong".. God is faithful. Even through my faults and shortcomings, HE is faithful. I've come to realize that no matter the detour I may take, as long as I find him again, and line back up, the plan is still the plan. There's no Plan B with God. NONE. It's a concept I feel like I understand, but in all reality have a hard time wrapping my mind around. There isn't a Plan B. There isn't another option. He knew, and he knows, and that's insane. NO PLAN B. Accepting this has released a lot of the anxiety I once carried. Remembering that it doesn't add a day to my life, but takes away from the person God asks me to be. Success isn't found in a career. Success isn't found in "the almighty dollar". Success is measured by how we love people, the lives we invest in, and the way we show Christ's love. When seeking Jesus, the plan is to trust the planner. Communicating with him consistently and intently to make sure it's all lining up as it should. And picking back up when we see that we've gotten off course.
There have been some AWESOME things that have happened this semester.. my first season coaching at the HS, and my girls make it to the Regional Semifinals. NUTS. "A young team that lost a lot of talent..." was only the THIRD team in Chobee's history to make it that far. - All glory to God. That wasn't me. It was all him. I was just the vessel. - On top of that, I will undoubtedly have a job when I graduate on 12/12/13, at a school that I want to be at, working with students I'm excited to get to know. Which is more than I can say for a lot of my friends who went through this program with me, many of them are unsure if they'll have a job and are hoping to find one next Fall. My God is faithful.
I feel like I hopped all over the place with this post, but I feel like that's all my brain has been doing recently anyway - Really, the bottom line is to remember that knowing the plan isn't the point, it's trusting the planner that's important. God is faithful. He is who he says he is, and he can/will do what he says he can/will do.
One more time - God is faithful. :) Believe it. Claim it. Never forget it.
Psalms 130:5 - I am counting on the Lord, yes I am counting on him.
I have put my hope in his word.
Psalms 16:8 - I know the Lord is always with me.
I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me.
Psalm 18:30 - God's way is perfect. All the Lord's promises prove true.
He is a shield to all who look to him for protection.
Got it? Good.
