Oh so good.

God is good.

He blesses me undeservingly and without limit. 

The biggest blessing thus far, my husband.

He's a man who loves me like Christ loves the church. 

He takes care of me, loves unconditionally, and reminds me everyday how special he thinks I am. 

He takes time to just listen when I need an ear, and hugs me from behind when he can see my anxiety rising. 

He's the optimist my sometimes pessimistic alter ego needs. 

He keeps me in check, and is always pointing me back to Jesus. 

He reminds me that I'm strong when I sometimes feel bogged down and weak. 

He prays BIG prayers, and believes in THE big God who hears and can answer them. 

Life just ain't the cake walk we want it to be. But God is so faithful to provide us with a hand to hold in His Holy Spirit and His word. And usually on more than one occasion we get blessed with people to hug us and hold us too. My husband is my favorite hug..

God revealed to me long before Jake and I were even dating that he was going to be my husband. I look back on the last three years and am so thankful for the hard stuff. It was 10 months of prayer after meeting Jake and hanging out with him a little, that taught me how to trust Jesus even when I couldn't see the whole picture. God asked me to pray for a man that I barely knew, and eventually revealed that I would one day marry him. It didn't make any sense. Many days being obedient sucked. It was hard. But I knew that I knew there was a purpose in my prayer, and that God had never asked me to do anything before that wasn't for a reason.. I had to trust him. I'm overjoyed that I did. Because I was obedient when it wasn't easy, because I prayed what and when the Holy Spirit prompted, I ended up with a husband who is more than I ever could have imagined.

Jake is a man who loves with every ounce of who he is.
He's compassionate, dependable, and would give the shirt off his back to anyone who needed it.
He's hard working and oh so creative when it comes to anything he can make with his hands.
He's my favorite everything.

If God is asking you to do something that doesn't quite make sense right now, I can't encourage you enough to stick to it. Do what He's asking and KNOW that His plans for you are GOOD. They will always turn out far better than anything you could have planned yourself. Sometimes it takes a bit of time to see the good, but He promises you'll see it eventually.

Press on!

God gets it. He comes through.

Yesterday I posted about trust, how it wasn't easy, but that it's what God asks of us. To trust without a limit.

The thing is that we are human, Christ dwells within us we contain the same power that HE did when He lived on this Earth, we still feel those feelings of the flesh. We have to learn how to keep them in check, and see them just as feelings, not as truth.

I've written about how feelings are just that.. FEELINGS.

The thing is that you can claim God's truth over your feelings.

You can claim peace over your anxiety.

You can claim joy over negativeness.

When you realize the power you have, through Jesus, it's almost like you can stand taller. Your chest pokes out more and the weight is lifted. You can look at the hard circumstance and be okay. You can see the struggle and still have peace that it's going to turn out okay, because God promises that. Sometimes the good isn't seen until we're on the other side of heaven, but we must believe that there is good.

I don't know what tomorrow holds, BUT GOD gives me just what I need to get through today. I don't have to know all the answers, I just need the answers for today.

TODAY.

He knew I would feel this way today.
He knew there would be ups and downs.
He holds in both of those, higher than my high, and tightly in my lows.

He gets it.

It doesn't lessen the purpose, it doesn't belittle my calling, it makes greater the joy that is coming.

And there is MORE joy that is coming - because I know that there is much joy already even in the struggle. But there is more that is to come... I await the day that is to come. The day I can say "YES! I get it now!!" Whether here or in Heaven, I'll get to say that. I'll get to see the Joy. Because God is good. He is who He says He is. And He will do what He has promised He will do.

He will come through for me.

This song by Bethel was good to me today, so I thought I'd share it with you.

                                            "Faithful To The End"

We're heaven-spun creations
His pride and adoration
Treasures woven by his love

His careful hands they hold us
Safe within His promise
Of calling and of destiny

I will sing of all You've done
I'll remember how far You carried me
From beginning until the end
You are faithful, faithful to the end

A Father's heart that's for me
A never ending story
Of love that's always chasing me

His kindness overwhelming
And hope for me unending
He's never given up on me

I will sing of all You've done
I'll remember how far You carried me
From beginning until the end
You are faithful, faithful to the end

There wasn't a day
That You weren't by my side
There wasn't a day
That You let me fall
All of my life
Your love has been true
All of my life
I will worship You

Trust

I'm unsure of how clear this blog will be, there's a million thoughts circulating in my head right now, too many to journal quickly enough to get them all down, so I type.

Trust - it's not an easy thing. We live in an imperfect world where most everything we encounter can fail. Maybe we haven't experienced every type of failure, and maybe most people in our lives are trustworthy.. but I don't think that makes it easier. As humans we do what we can to trick ourselves into believing that we are in control. We plan our lives and write things in pretty planners with the hopes that what is written will go our way. And though many things might, it is inevitable that a plan will fail. A parent will fail. A husband will fail. A friend will fail. A pastor will fail. Our car will fail. I will fail. We fail. 

And though this may sound cliche, God doesn't fail. He didn't write a second plan, the first one is as it is. He is sovereign. 

I've struggled recently with an anger that I couldn't put my finger on until the trust word came up. I'm not quite sure if I was angry with the situation itself or the fact that it just wasn't going the way I thought it should. It didn't match what I was writing in my "pretty planner" and that made me angry... But all the while through the anger I heard God ask me to trust him, He whispered quietly as I yelled or cried. He used my husband and close friends to remind me where my hope lies, to trust HIM. 

Life is rarely easy, but good things can be found in even the worst of situations. God asks us to trust him without borders or limits. He wants us to understand that while we can't see the whole picture HE can. And that in the midst of the struggle He holds us with the promise that He is in control. Many of our circumstances are not ideal, but hanging on a cross wasn't ideal for a man who did no wrong..BUT GOD made good from that. Surely He'll do the same for us. 

We have to look at our circumstances and think BUT GOD.... not BUT THE WORLD says... BUT MY mom says... BUT MY friend says.... BUT GOD SAYS..

We have to dive into scripture to speak it over our lives. We can't live on the secondhand faith of our parents or our pastor. Our faith must become our own. 

Believe me when I tell you that these words are meant for me but I'm sharing them with the hope that someone who like me, is struggling to trust in a situation will be further encouraged to look to Jesus for the hope that only he can provide. 

The scripture below is found in Isaiah 61 - it spoke to me this week when listening to Joyce Meyer speak about brokenness vs wholeness. 

Verse 7 says "Instead of shame you will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace you will rejoice in your inheritance, and so you will inherit a double portion in your land, and everlasting joy will be yours."

You see we can't look back on what we think should have happened, or what we're missing out on because it didn't go the way we planned. We have to know that when we trade our ashes God gives us beauty. And that what we thought we should have had God doubles our portion and really what we get is greater than what was in OUR original plan. "Instead of ashes the oil of joy..." (vs 3) You can have joy when it doesn't go your way. You can have peace when walls seem to be crumbling around you because God is sovereign.. and He can take any negative thing we've been through and make it good. You must believe that regardless of circumstance, HE can make ALL things good. 

He will. It's who He is.

The Year of the Lord’s Favor 

1The Spirit of the Sovereign Lordis on me, 

because the Lordhas anointed me 

to proclaim good news to the poor. 

He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, 

to proclaim freedom for the captives 

and release from darkness for the prisoners,

2to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor 

and the day of vengeance of our God, 

to comfort all who mourn, 

3and provide for those who grieve in Zion— 

to bestow on them a crown of beauty 

instead of ashes, 

the oil of joy 

instead of mourning, 

and a garment of praise 

instead of a spirit of despair. 

They will be called oaks of righteousness, 

a planting of the Lord

for the display of his splendor. 

4They will rebuild the ancient ruins 

and restore the places long devastated; 

they will renew the ruined cities 

that have been devastated for generations. 

5Strangers will shepherd your flocks; 

foreigners will work your fields and vineyards. 

6And you will be called priests of the Lord, 

you will be named ministers of our God. 

You will feed on the wealth of nations, 

and in their riches you will boast. 

7Instead of your shame 

you will receive a double portion, 

and instead of disgrace 

you will rejoice in your inheritance. 

And so you will inherit a double portion in your land, 

and everlasting joy will be yours. 

8“For I, the Lord, love justice; 

I hate robbery and wrongdoing. 

In my faithfulness I will reward my people 

and make an everlasting covenant with them. 

9Their descendants will be known among the nations 

and their offspring among the peoples. 

All who see them will acknowledge 

that they are a people the Lordhas blessed.” 

10I delight greatly in the Lord; 

my soul rejoices in my God. 

For he has clothed me with garments of salvation 

and arrayed me in a robe of his righteousness, 

as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, 

and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels. 

11For as the soil makes the sprout come up 

and a garden causes seeds to grow, 

so the Sovereign Lordwill make righteousness 

and praise spring up before all nations.

Mini Vaca taught me this... my husband is too nice.

Jake and I started our week in Orlando at a Timeshare, just for two nights.. it was short but kind of FREE so we weren't complaining! It's nice to get out of town and enjoy each other's company outside of the normal routine. Sunday started with Sunday School and Church at Westside, then we headed to Chobee to drop off the dogs.. Well two of them. Our big guy is spending the week up in TN with his "Grandparents" - they were kind enough to take him along and we're quite sure he's loving life. His Uncle Nic was excited that Hank was able to hang out with his son, Moose on Father's day weekend.. ha! (I assure you we do know that they are in fact dogs, but they're family.)

     

ANYWAY - After dropping off the crazy little white faced ones at my parents we were off! Once to the hotel we got up to our room to get settled. We scoped out the pools and then got ready for dinner. With the NBA championship on TV we opted for the Ale house down the road to enjoy the game. Jake can talk to anybody and made friends with the guy sitting next to him at the Bar. Jake is nice. I saw this at dinner, but I also saw it the next morning. 

You see the reason our two night vacation was "free" was because we had to sit through a ninety minute presentation about why we should buy this timeshare... we are in no position to buy a timeshare so we went in with the mindset of NO we are not interested but give us your best pitch, we'll give you our best "no thank you", and be on our way $175 dollars richer... Our ninety minute presentation turned into a 3 hour presentation as my husband is just TOO NICE. It was quite funny and by the end of it I was so ready to sit by the pool that I looked at Jake and very nicely said "SHUT UP" when the salesman walked away. When we left with our gift card in hand I told Jake that I knew who would do the negotiating next time we went to buy a vehicle.. and it didn't rhyme with rake..

We enjoyed the rest of our day by the pool and then showered up and headed to a restaurant that Jake has been raving about since last October when he visited while at a school conference. It's called  The Pharmacy, and had a real 1930's speakeasy feel. The food was fantastic and the atmosphere was just as awesome. We got two different meals and shared them, and I ate an oyster for the first time!!

This was the entrance.. So cool!!

That night we slept like babies with full tummies and got up early to pack and head to Seaworld the next day.. We rode every roller coaster sitting on the front row and most of them twice! We watched my favorite show with the Sea Lions and Otters, and ended the day with a Shamu Ice Cream bar. 

This weekend away was just what we needed after a pretty stressful first few weeks of summer, thank you Jesus for blessing us with the opportunity! 

What kind of people get married twice?! Us. We did that.

Getting married in front of a Cross was something I always wanted, and we got to do it twice!