So you asked me how Rebekah's doing... Pt. 2

It's been a little over three months since our dear friend walked into Heaven.

I say walked because her legs work there, and I know she got up, and walked in. I can imagine her running and jumping into the arms of Jesus with a smile that radiates HIS glory.

How's Rebekah doing? Rebekah is HEALED.

Rebekah no longer walks with a little limp, but struts with strong bones and strengthened muscles.

How's Rebekah doing? Rebekah is HEALED.

Rebekah no longer only lifts her right arm part way above her head, but waves and raises both arms fully to praise her Abba Father!

Rebekah is HEALED.

Last Monday was her 27th birthday. I won't say that it "would have been"  because it WAS, it just wasn't HERE. She celebrated her 27th year of life in the place that we all long for, in her eternal home with her most gracious Father. The Father who anxiously waited to celebrate that birthday with her in heaven, as He knew the first 26 would be spent on Earth.

Think about that? God knew He would get to celebrate that 27th birthday with her, don't you think that excited Him?! To celebrate His girl where she was meant to live forever?! Amazing.

Though missing her happens often, it isn't something that sticks around for long. For I know she is living, just not near me at the moment. I know that one day, I'll celebrate another birthday with her.

Today my mind is thinking a lot about having and keeping an eternal perspective. Remembering that though it seems like it will be ages before we hug her again, in the perspective of Eternity, it's but a blink of an eye.

It's easy to get caught up in the frustrations of life on Earth. Financially feeling strapped and anxious about how the money will come in. BUSY with the craziness of work, kids, sports, etc..wondering where God is in the midst of it, and being convicted when we're not taking the time to SEE Him in it.

Rebekah had an eternal perspective. Her husband, Jared, had and has an eternal perspective. Though not always easy to maintain, it's necessary to trudge through the grit of what life can be. When our focus is eternity, the struggle seems more bearable, as we know it's temporary.

My goal is to focus on the "line" and not the "speck".

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My Dad has drawn this illustration many times - that dot representing our lives here on earth, even if we get 90 or 100 years, those years are NOTHING in light of eternity but they mean EVERYTHING when it comes to where you'll spend that eternity.

Focus on Jesus.
Focus on the Forever.
Not the right now, not the struggle, not the temporary.

Mark 13:31 (NIV)

Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.

1 John 2:17 (NIV)

The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever.

2 Corinthians 4:18 (NIV)

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

I'm thankful for the opportunity to focus on eternity, that though I am broken and unworthy, God provided a way because HE wants to spend eternity with ME. And He wants to spend it with you too.. 

Hashtag Hot Mess #HHM

Maybe it's pregnancy, maybe it's the fact that I am a female (who just spelled female "femail" three times before getting it right).. but today, I'm a mess.

Today is a GREAT day. Today Jake and I celebrate two years married. My husband  is my best friend. He is the ONE God created to fill every need and want I didn't even know existed when it comes to a spouse. He cherishes me, and pushes me towards Jesus.

But today, I'm a mess.

My heart has been heavy recently, riddled with conviction of not doing enough. This morning I listened to a message by Pastor Steven Furtick called " Are you growing your gifts?" - He talks about how God loves GOOD things, not things that are half done with the right heart - we should have the right heart AND do things WELL. God has told me countless times to be in his word more, and to write more. Do I do it? No. Instead I journal here and there when it's convenient, or I blog here and there when God REALLY pushes me.

Where is the discipline? There is SO much fufillment when I do what he has asked, so much release when I sit down and put to paper the thoughts and things the Holy Spirit is speaking.. so why don't I do it more consistently? Where is my effort? It's wrapped up in excuses. "I'm so busy" - but let's watch an episode of Arrow on Netflix. "I'm just exhausted" - so let's sleep an extra 20mins because you stayed up watching that episode of Arrow. Stupid. It's a matter of discipline. Carving out time and making it a habit.

God, I come to you asking for HELP. Convict me so deeply that I can't even stand the thought of watching that episode or of sleeping those extra mins. Keep at the forefront of my mind that YOU are greater than ALL things, and YOU deserve my utmost attention. I'm sorry for only giving you "half" worship.. Thanks for loving me any way, even when I suck. And lately, I feel like I suck more than don't suck. You are good, ALL the time. Reveal yourself to me in the smallest things, that I would begin to see you more.