Ahh!

A few nights ago I blogged about finding out that my research paper wasn't submitted completely for one of my classes and that I was unsuccessful "re"finding it to resubmit it.

WELL this morning as I was working on one of the rough drafts I could find, I had been praying, and I decided to search my computer one more time. I went to the same places I had looked before, but clicked on another link....and BOOM! There it was! Totally and completely...complete! :D

ALL praise to Jesus, I know that paper wasn't there before, and he did a number and helped me out immensely.

He's SOOOOO fantastic!!

So again, THANK YOU JESUS for taking care of your daughter, I am so undeserving but you do it anyway!

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

From panic, to peace.

Panic = Turning in the Critical Assignment for one of your classes, 1800 word research paper that you've spent large amounts of time on, only to find out that said paper didn't submit but the first page........and the completed paper is no where to be found on the computer it was saved on.......

Peace = My God is bigger than a "Critical" Assignment.....and no matter how this turns out, he loves me. And I'll be in heaven with him one day because he loves me....SO instead of bursting into tears, throwing up, and having a complete anxiety attack...I claim peace in Jesus name. Amen.

Gungor

This band has put to words many of the things I have been feeling lately...blessing me so big right now.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OR7VOKQ0xJY

Beautiful Things
All this pain
I wonder if I’ll ever find my way
I wonder if my life could really change at all
All this earth
Could all that is lost ever be found
Could a garden come up from this ground at all

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

All around
Hope is springing up from this old ground
Out of chaos life is being found in You

You make me new, You are making me new

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJWHZnZ9E6k

Dry Bones
my soul cries out
my soul cries out for you

these bones cry out
these dry bones cry for you
to live and move
only You
can raise the dead
lift my head up

Jesus, You’re the one who saves us
Constantly creates us into something new
Jesus You’re the one who finds us
Surely our Messiah will make all things new

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpATmuPr84Q\

You Have Me
out on the farthest edge
there in the silence
you were there

My faith was torn to shreds
heart in the balance
but you were there

always faithful
always good
you have still have my
you still have my heart

I thought I had seen the end
everything broken
but you were there

I've wandered heaven's gates
I've made my bed in hell
You were there still

You have me
You have my heart completely

Rest in My Radient Presence....

The world around you seems to spin faster and faster, until everything is a blur. Yet there is a cushion of calm at the center of your life, where you live in union with Me. Return to this soothing Center as often as you can, for this is where you are energized; filled with My love, Joy, and Peace.

The world is a needy place; do not go there for sustenance. Instead, come to Me. Learn to depend on Me alone, and your weekness will become saturated with My Power. When you find your completeness in Me, you can help other people without using them to meet your own needs. Live in the Light of My presence, and you light will shine brightly into the lives of others.

1 John 4:12 -- No one has ever seen God. But if we love each other, God lives in us, and his love is brought to full expression in us.

This devotional came from "Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young -- I will share from this devotional a lot :)

I really felt like this matched the release I felt on Sunday. When we depend on our Father in our weakness we "become saturated in his power". How awesome is that? Though I am weak, he makes me strong. To think that we can find strength and power anywhere else but in him, is wrong. That's hard for someone like me, someone who feels that she is naturally strong, and can handle anything thrown at her, on her own. Slowly I am becoming broken of that mindset.....I find more and more that when I think I am in control of a situation I really am quite the opposite, needing more guidence than ever.

I pray that God would continue to break me so that I will continually seek his power, and not try and find strength in my own.

Please Be my Strength -- Gungor
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEOTwlLKpqo

Phew!

Stress has been consuming my life as of late. And quite frankly, I'm tired of it.

I'm done.

I'm done worrying.
I'm done trying to control.
I'm done being "strong".

I'm done.

I've spent far too much time being busy. School, work, volleyball, personal things, etc, TOO MUCH. It's all too much. And tonight, I finally felt it, all of it. The weight of the world was resting on my shoulders, and I was trying with all my might to hold it up, and I couldn't. Tonight I fell and came crashing to the realization that I am not my own. I am not strong enough. I am not capable enough, to handle it all on my own. This Jesus, that I've kept putting on the back burner, wants ALL of it. He created and conquered the world, so why am I trying to hold it myself? It's not like its even in my hands, really its more like I'm doing my darnedest to pull it away from God. HA! That's funny, me? Pull something from God? Pshhh, not. Really i was just wasting time trying to control, when what I needed to do was put it down, leave it in God's hand and pursue him without all the 'busy'.

So that's what I'm doing. Never in my life have I understood this concept the way I do right now.  
I can't do it...but HE can.
I can't handle it....but HE can.

So God, it's yours. All of it. School, work, volleyball, family things....all of it. I'm DONE. Starting today all I want is to seek you, completely. Without all the 'busy'. I want YOU, Jesus, to consume my thoughts, not the stress of everything else.

I'm sorry I've tried so hard to do it by myself.
Thank you Father for loving me enough to take all of my burdens, fears, and failures.
You are eternally awesome, and I love you.

I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD in the land in the living.
--Psalm 27:13

I will not lose heart.

My God has HUGE plans for me, I believe that I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living....Life is tough, but my Jesus is tougher.